Today, as I reread this article about John and Julie Gottman that ran in the New York Times last year, I reflected on how frequently I talk to couples about the concept of “turning toward.” The Gottmans have researched intimate relationships for decades and their work has provided us with data that is invaluable for anyone who wants to learn to be a better partner. One of my main take-aways from their work is that, when it comes to improving our love lives, very small, simple actions can have a huge impact.
Long Covid and ME/CFS (Myalgic Encephalomyelitis/Chronic Fatigue Syndrome)
I recently gave a workshop at The Southern California Counseling Center entitled “What do Psychotherapists need to know about Long Covid, ME/CFS, and Other “Invisible” Illnesses? How to effectively support patients and caregivers.”
According to The Census Bureau, as of July 2022, 16.3 million (around 8%) of working age Americans have Long Covid, also known as Post-Acute Covid-19 Syndrome (PACS). Recent studies indicate that over 40% of Long Covid patients meet the diagnostic criteria for Myalgic Encephalomyelitis (ME/CFS).
The Kryptonite of Mental Health
Are there certain things you consistently avoid because you don’t like doing them? Seems normal to me. But what if avoiding them causes problems in your life? Why do we continue in those cases?
After attending a lecture presented by Sue Johnson, developer of Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy, I couldn’t stop thinking about one phrase she used:
“Avoidance is the kryptonite of mental health.”
Although I was never a big superhero fan, even I know that kryptonite is a powerful substance from Superman’s home planet which can weaken him and disable his superpowers.